Friday, February 29, 2008

I Would Rather Not

Go near my sink until I get this photo out of my head!

Faux Photos

Photo fakery done to prove a point in China. This photo won a prize but was lambasted as antelope won't go near trains. How rude!

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Weddings Announcements in the Times

One of my favorite things to do on Sunday is to read the Weddings section of the Times. I don't so much 'read' but rather look at the portraits. The whole thing is pretty hilarious, submitting your story, answering questions, undergoing a 'fact-check and then sending them a portrait of you and your spouse to the paper. The best, my most favorite thing ever though is the single photo. I get that it was once very ladylike and proper to only discuss 'the lady's marriage'. That being said, there's nothing that says, "so not really into my spouse, just happy to finally get married and land in the Times" than a photo of just the bride. So rude (but fun -totally fun).

In my search for an image, I came across this 'Veiled Conceit' blog. It's kind of angry but pretty funny.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

A Stapler Cozy

I was out of the office for a few days only to find THIS on my desk. No one seems to know who left this here but a sudden IM from Rhonda asked if I liked my "stapler cozy". Typically I would need warning a little time before I ran into something like this.

How Does This Happen?

This is really quite rude. The pet owner should have to wear the costumes, outfits, etc. for a full 24 hours before subjecting their dependents to this sort of crazy show. If they feel good about it then put it on the poor creature.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Jury Duty!

OK it is just a "qualification questionnaire" that was waiting for me in the mailbox. I get very nervous dealing with the government -especially when they are asking me a series of simple yes-or-no questions. I feel like there's such a good chance that I'll get one wrong. I know what you are thinking. How could YOU miss one of these very simple questions?!? Well, multiple choice questions really bring me back to standardized testing and I became competitive thinking about the other potential jurors out there in Kings County (first time I realized that I live in Kings County - so fitting isn't it?). Anyway, since they only gave me 10 days to respond I decided to test the online questionnaire option. This made the series of questions more intense as the page could time out, there could be a browser error, etc. Then what? Would I have to call to make sure that they received it? Too much! Much too much! The whole process is rude and I don't like seeing 'federal court' and 'punishable by law' thrown around anything with my name and address attached. I am hoping that I answered their questions correctly so that I don't have to appear in court. Although a trip to court is worthy of a new hat...

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Friday, February 22, 2008

Terminally Rude!

I am sorry to not provide pictures but I must share some flagrant rude behavior from JFK airport this morning. First, there was a woman doing yoga. Mind, body and spirit all in perfect harmony. Too bad it offended moi. As Aunt Sassy said,"I don't want to see THAT!" Along similar lines, there was a lot of shoe removing in the terminal. I understand that it is required at security but THAT is all good friends. Your dirty socks must remain inside your shoes just like you are in ANY public space. Please. How dare you.

Winter Storm! YOU Are Grounded!

It appears that the only recognizable snowfall in Brooklyn this winter is happening today. That's SO unbelievably rude. I'm supposed to fly this morning...

Thursday, February 21, 2008

"It Is the Mark of a Lady to be Always Well Shod"

Blasphemy NYMag photos too much! Much too much! Is that a TATTOO!?! Ladies, please turn your heads. How rude!

Serbs Storm U.S. Embassy

As usual, trouble in the Balkans. Not good. I'm very concerned. How rude!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

So I Live With a Super Delegate? Wait. What?

The more I observe M.B.'s media habits, I can't help but suspect that he may be a super delegate. How rude to keep such pertinent information from the lady of the house!

There Goes the Moon

I personally won't be able to see tonight's lunar eclipse due to the large, obstructive building across the street. How rude!

A Tip for a Tip

A British dinner party recently received this check.

Awkward and Rude!

Monday, February 18, 2008

Refrigerator Etiquette: Chill Out People

Everyone knows that companies always threaten to remove all contents of the shared fridge over the weekend, especially over LONG weekends. That being said, if there was Tupperware in the fridge, don't eat the food and steel these most cherished guardians of freshness. How rude!

Happy President's Day!

Saturday, February 16, 2008

I Told You ALL. The Sky is Falling!

I have obviously been closely following the trajectory of the 3.5 TON satellite which is falling, falling, falling. Now, I'm sure you are aware that there is a 'trash' issue out there in the great beyond and someone needs to clean it up! How rude!

Popcorn Invades Dessert

Just got back from a delicious dinner with MB (my beloved). Dinner ended with THIS. Popcorn impersonating dessert... how rude!

Friday, February 15, 2008

Oh Jane!

Very rude. Morning or night, a lady should not use that language!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

eviction! today is moving day!

Old Space
New Space

New Lighting!
Rudeness took hold. Coping mechanism I think.
Please. How DARE you.- The Bunny

The Soul Patch

After staring at one for an entire day (inside a conference room with leftover mayonnaise thank-you-very-much), I've decided that the 'soul patch' is probably the most offensive facial hair out there. Would be interested in hearing your opinions. I've looked all over (don't worry about that) and it's pretty clear that the soul patch wins hands down.

P.S. -Please note the 'chin curtain' as it is peculiarly perverse in form and structure.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Driving Me Batty

I think that it is rude to spend time and energy on this whole Roger Clemens steroid investigation. It feels like the committee is just excited to meet their favorite player. So bizarre. I can't stand the fact that I'm also fascinated by the whole thing -especially the part about him injecting his wife with roids. That's incredible. A lady should not need nor desire 'performance enhancing drugs'.

Deposit Slips

A woman deposited an envelope of methamphetamine in her local credit union somewhere in Washington. That's kind of rude.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Best in Show

As ALL of you probably know, we're knee deep in the Westminster Dog Show here in NY! My friends at MSG actually threw me this bone (I hate myself) that Champion K-Run's Park Me in First, aka 'Uno', won the top hound spot. There's really no point to this post other than the fact that this dog is clearly thinking, 'how rude' in this photo...

Anti-Teen Device

The notion that devices to keep teens away (much like misquito zappers or dog whistles) is a good idea is just rude! (Thanks sis for the update)

Monday, February 11, 2008

Facebook Won't Let Me Go!

How weird (and RUDE!). Not that I'm ready to quit Facebook, I'm sensing that it's not going to be easy...

Ha ha ha ha ha. I'm Still Unhappy.

Oprah is happy because of 'Laughing Yoga' and encourages all of you to practice. Really? That's why she's happy?

Modern "Love" in the Dorm

Brilliant for the New York Times to create a college essay contest for 'Modern Love'. I do think that it should be open to young women in NYC given that it SEEMS like they are looking for great dating/love stories around the inter-nets, AIM, myspace, facebook, jdate, etc. College students may have good stories but my friends have better ones. Hands Down. How Rude.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Salaryman May Be a Polite Napper

This Japanese Salaryman is so polite he takes his nap standing. Unfortunately, I've heard from my international contact (who happens to be viably pregnant!), that many-a-salaryman refuse to give up their seats for a LADY. How. RUDE!

Ann Coulter Splits

Ann Coulter's hair offends me. The color, the length, the split ends, her roots. ACHT! I wish that was the only thing that I found offensive. How rude.

Super Fan on the Town

Believe me, there's NOTHING rude about team spirit. I do, however, take offense to pajama-wearing in public.

Friday, February 8, 2008


I just learned that my office space is being taken over by someone way high up and totally important. I have to move into a cubicle! Worse yet... A cubicle with florescent lights. To this I say, how rude!

How Ruuuuude!

My pre-teen idol, Stephanie Tanner is 'expecting'. Congratulations to her. Didn't see that coming.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Waiter, There's a Baby in My Drink

My friend Jackie just returned from her native New Orleans for a Mardi Gras celebration. She showed me this picture and I couldn't help but wonder, " is this is the rudest cocktail I've ever seen?" Tell I'm wrong.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Sticking it in My Eye!

A friend nearly had her eye poked out on the sidewalk today. How rude! This is a polite umbrella that I carry. A good thing (upgrade!) for those of you who are walking around with scary, dangerous, the-wires-are-poking-out-in-all-directions monstrosities!

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Pull Your Lever?

I feel like the board of elections takes 'vintage furniture' a bit too far. I'm all for antiques but it is terrifying to depend on them in electing our next president.

Mr. Black Leather Glove

Black leather gloves have always made me nervous. Black leather gloves indoors is even scarier. Black leather gloves next to your head on the F train at 8am is just rude.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Mr. Belichick Storms Off Field

A very public display of unsportsmanlike conduct yesterday. Very rude!

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Double Dipping

Rude AND now officially unsanitary!

Bed Bugs?

Really not interested in entering your hardware store after seeing this sign thank you very much. Obviously had to immediately go home and take a shower.

French President Marries Ex-Model

Only four months after ending his second marriage, French President Nicolas Sarkozy married Italian model Carla Bruni in a small ceremony at Elysee Palace on Saturday. Very rude to deprive us of a public wedding!

Let Him Out!

A Jesus locked up in a box...